Ahmad Fathi - When I'm Gone

A prayer. Oh God, i pray only to thee for only in you i believe. There's no God but you and you are the all-mighty. I seek for the strength i need to overcome one of the biggest obstacle in my life, the A level. Oh grant me the stregth, health, mentality, intelligence and ability to overcome the A level. God, i'll try my best and the rest is up to you for i believe only i have to power to mould my future but ultimately, it is you who decides. God, this is my prayer. Amin! Hmm...it's been a long week especially when you get infected by a virus like me. Sigh. Thank God i needed only 2 days to recover. Mugging this week is not that productive. Sigh. I have to attend this meet the parent session at college and my dad was pretty late. When he came finally, i was surprised to see my mom and my what-the-heck sister. This is going to be a family affair. Haha. Anyway, yeah, as usual, Miss Tie ticked me off because i forgot to bring along the result slip. Opps! Then she talked to my dad about me failing my GP, i can't be bothered about GP now, not until i'm left with 2 months to A level. She also told my dad that i failed my econs. Sulks! I could have passed that paper. Sigh! Anyway, she complained to my dad about me spotting long side burns to school. Like what the hell! Haha. I was carrying a book entitled What Dreams May Come by Richard Matheson and Miss Tie asked me what i was holding. So i told her that i've been reading books and she assumed that i'm reading a love novel. Haha. So i told her that i'm reading a thriller book. Haha. Phew! Luckily i didn't tell her that i'm a Nicholas Sparks' fan. My dad will laugh at me! Hurhur! Yeah anyway, i managed to write a poem whilst waiting for my dad and i swear it seems difficult nowadays to write poem. The idea simply wouldn't flow. Sigh. That Huishan and Co. disturbed me when i was doing my maths at the canteen. She sat infront of me together with Lydia and Masada and they giggled and giggled their hearts out. Don't ask me why they were there! Haha. Maybe they got bored and decided to bully me. Who knows? Haha. What to do? I'm cosmetically and horizontally challenged like what Huishan might say. Haha. That vertically challenged girl! Haha. No offence! Haha. Well, today is a boring day. That's all i can say. So enjoy the poem:

Ahmad Fathi - When I'm Gone

Just lately, I've been wondering
About the future in store for you
You should know i won't be staying
God will take me away from you

Will you ever find the strength
To brave yourself without me?
Are you able to go the length
And live your life without me?

For now you have me to guide you
I'll make sure your path is clear
For now i'll always be by you
And put away all your fear

I promise to give you my all
And go anywhere you will be
I'll make our love stand tall
Proudly for everyone to see

When i'm gone, don't shed any tears
Life will go on without me
I'll pray for you throughout the years
Until one day you come back to me

Expenditure Creates Income

Well...i got back my mid-year result and it was atrocious. I got A for C Maths, E for Physics and O for Econs. What the hell! I could have passed Econs if only i have answered the second part to the second question. It is damn irritating! Miss Tie condemned me for not using her points in her notes. She is bias in marking. I think i should just stick with my tuition teacher's notes. His is more colourful and easier to memorise. What the hell. Anyway, i've been picking up momentum on mugging and it has been going pretty well but could be better and i hope next week will be even better. Recently, i noticed our local media going hype with the NKF scandal. Sheesh, please lah especially the Malay newspaper. They can only survive when there is some wonderful incident happening. They are not creative at all. No incident tantamount no story. Haha. I've been reading this interesting blog of an Ah Beng who writes every thing from A to Z. He will criticise anybody and i mean anybody including the Government. His entries are hypercritical and i like it. Recently, there's this hoo-haa about writing anything stupid on your blog and they even legislate a law on this. From now onwards, you cannot criticise or accuse anyone without concrete proof or statistics and even if you criticise, it shouldn't be with the intention of bringing his name down. Like what the hell! Do you think i fucking care about all these? No way! I shall write what i feel is right and what i want to write. I hope Singaporeans will dare to publish such hypercritical entries or articles on the internet not just to criticise but for interesting read as well. Singapore is just too boring and dry! Hmm...recently, Nina have been complaining to me about some preacher in college. He or she has been preaching to others about Christianity. I'm not against Christianity but wat the preacher is doing is totally wrong. He or she is being insensitive and obviously he or she is not respecting other people's religions. So read my lips...FUCK OFF! This is a stern warning to future preachers out there in college, be it a Muslim, Christian or a Buddhist, be responsible with your tongue! Cheap skate preaching is not te way to convince people to convert and so is violence. And to the guy or girl who said that the Quran is a carbon copy of Bible, go and fuck yourself. Get your facts right first before you say anything. Go and do some research first before you pester people. That's that! Anyway, yeaps, i'm craving for a set of PS2 and i'm thinking of buying PS3 next year. It has been a while since i last play a game. I shall use my NS pay to purchase PS3. I just don't want to go out often like i did when i served my NS this year. I kept spending and now i'm so broke. PS3 will keep me at home. Hehe. With my Ns pay, i bought a Hugo Boss Bottled, $40 plus Tough Wallet, a Scrumcap for Rugby, a pair of Nike Air Force shoe, a meal at Seoul Garden, a meal at Fish and Co, expenses for my Rugby trip at Kedah playing for Police Rugby Team, a $40 Adidas New Zealand All Blacks shirt, couple of bites at Old Chang Kee, couple of drinks at Spinelli and lastly hundreds of dollars spent on cigarettes especially Lucky Strikes. Sigh. I'm so damn broke now. Oh yeah, i forgot, a dinner at an Arabic Restaurant. Yum yum! Well at least i've contributed much to the economy. Haha. Well, there's nothing else to say here. I just hope there'll be no more bombing. We need peace here. The meaning of Islam is actually peace. I'm just disappointed with some irresponsible people. Too bad they are going straight to hell! Adios!

The Testimonial

There's no rugby match like the college testimonial rugby match. What do i have to prove? I wanted to prove to my juniors especially the current j2s that i'm not a lousy player like i were in the A division season. I was bugged with multiple injuries and that affected my A division season. Like i said, this testimonial match involved proving many people wrong. I wanted to prove to coach that i am a good rugby player as well as a guy who is versatile. I don't want to be the average Joe and i swear to God i have proven others wrong. The testimonial match was on Thursday and every body couldn't wait for it. The thrash talking and taunting went on even 1 month before the match. The heat was on on Thursday. After months without playing rugby, we were excited to put on our rugby boots, well at least some people have the actual rugby boots. This match totally differentiated the pristine ruggers from the posers. The match went pretty smooth. I started as the no. 8 man after Cong Han wanted to play as the fly-half. Few minutes later, he decided to swoop position. This is my second time in my life playing as a fly-half. I was nervous at first but soon my confidence overshadowed my nervousness. We played 3 sets of 20 minutes and boy i did survived the 3 sets. It was taxing i tell you. Hmm...since i was the make-shift fly-half, i didn't know that much moves and so i sticked to simple moves as my backline wasn't that rock solid yet. Oh, by the way, i was playing for the j1 as well as Hamid, Zaid and Nicholas. I was shouting my lungs out throughout the 3 sets because i was pretty annoyed with my forwards. They were not rucking and gaining possesion but i have to admit i was pretty impressed with their tackling. At least their tackling seemed better than the j2's when the j2's were at the j1's stage at this time of the year last year. I have to run a lot in this match because my scrum-half didn't feed me with good balls. The balls that were given to me were awfully slow and i have little time to kick or execute the next move as the opponent's line of defence went up to me pretty fast. Basically i controlled the game for j1. Each time i failed to execute a move with the backline due to poor ball service from the no. 9, i would run with the ball. I gained many grounds with those runs. Boy, i was happy with my runs because i managed to side-step, do the 360 degrees turn and crash unto people. How about my kicking then. I decided not to kick far because i know if i kick far, my accuracy will be gone. Thus, i kicked for touch to gain only few metres. I was the dirtiest player too because i was the guy with the most late lift tackles. I lift tackled Alex, Kai Cheng and even Freddy. The feeling was good. I even attempted the drop kick was the kick was awful. Later in the match, my team was slapped with yet another set back because Cong Han went down injured. Later the next day, we found out that he had fractured his ankle. Ouch!! Aidil came down to watch the match after finishing his work at KILNS. The match ended with my team losing but the loss wasn't a big deal. Ofcourse, the j2's are better but in the end, everybody was the real winner. But i have to praise the j1 for their bravery for putting a tough fight for the j2. Matthew played too after a long abscence from the sport due to shoulder injury. Well, the match was tarnished with a bad incident nearing to the end of the game. I actually clubbed Jo Wee's back and he was furious with me and who wouldn't? Rite? But what the fuck! If you mess with me, you will sure to get it. Do i regret doing it? Hell no but i'm sorry about it because obviously he did nothing against me. Well, let's put all those in the game and let it be history. Well, i was surprised to see some body online yesterday after a long abscence. She added me in her msn list. It's been a while since i last chatted with her. I think i was at fault too because i was such a sore loser. I even gave her a cold shoulder treatment. I guess the misunderstanding between us has been cleared and she even said sorry about the incident the other day at my blog. I should be the one saying sorry all these while. What ever it is, i'm glad it is over. After all, i have to see her everyday in my life for another 4 months. Obviously i want to leave the college with good memories. Well at least i have proved that Murphy's law is so true! Haha. To that guy over there who once went to school wearing a blue tie looking like a businessman wannabe and who totally thinks he could step on my head multiple times and who also thinks he is a Saint but in actual fact he is just a Satanic twirp, who is having the last laugh now? I'm not afraid even if you take out your hockey stick because i'll just run and crash you through! Well, for now, we are both even. I have got nothing against him now! Well, i'm said to say that Miss Tie, our economic teacher, will be leaving us even before the A level. This will be a very sad moment for us because she is the best teacher in school. Even though she's notoriously fierce, it means she cares for us. There's a saying that days if somebody scolds you, it means her or she cares for you. What ever it is, i want to get at least a B for econs for her and for myself. I promise!!

Lonely

Well...this is it for me. Tommorrow will be the first day that i will start on my Mission Kashmir. What is Mission Kashmir? Nope, it is not a terrorist plot. Haha. I'm not a terrorist anyway. Hmm...Mission Kashmir will start from tommorrow onwards and it will end in December, which is the last day of my A level examination. For about four months, i will put in extra effort to mug and revise and ultimately, my goal is A for Maths, B for Econs, C for Physics and A2 for GP. This is it. My very last chance to save myself from shame and failure. Four months of suffering is nothing compared to an eternity of failure and shame. I know i can do it and i pray to thee God to help me in my quest. There's no power that is greater than yours oh All-Mighty. Enough said. Like Ikhsan would say, let's not just talk the talk but also walk the walk. May God bless me! Anyway, i really love the chinese drama on Channel 3 that is being played from Monday to Friday at 9pm. The title of the drama is A New Life. I really love that show man! Firstly, it is just not any lay man show but it is a value-added show and it shows us the reality of life. That show also encourages us that in life, it is all about what you believe in. If you believe you can do it, then you will do it and achieve what you desire. It also shows us that we should never give up in life. If there's a problem, there's always a solution. I truly enjoy the show. I simply love chinese dramas and shows because they relate me to the real world unlike those stupid Malay shows. Firstly, Malay shows sucks to the max because there's no entertainment value and there's nothing to look up to. Unlike Malay shows, Chinese shows portray the real thing and the message being sent to the viewers are clear and most of the messages are being sent in a creative and entertaining ways. Then, there's this Malay news at 8pm. It is fuck shit! Most of the news are out dated. Just look at the Malay Berita Harian, or the only Malay news paper. What the fuck! I can just read the news on the internet than reading the stupid news paper. I know if i say this people will start suing me but do u think i care? The Malays here need to wake up man. I'm not saying that i'm good but if the Malays don't want to move, let me be the one to be sued because i believe without scoldings and reminders, most Malays would not want to work. I am not afraid of the authority because i believe this is a free world. I can say what i want to say as long it is the truth and i'm not insulting others because i just want to insult them. I insult them so that they will wake up. Gosh. Just look around and you'll see what i mean. I'm not a racist and infact i'm proud to be a Malay but look what majority of the Malays are doing! Well, i shan't say further. What ever it is, i would want to go to the university and prove to others and myself that i can do it. No pain, no gain. Adios!